Hello and Welcome.
I’m Susan Gray, a counsellor and psychotherapist living in Yorkshire and working online across the UK so that you can engage in counselling from your own home or safe space.
If you’re visiting this page it's possible that you have had enough of feeling the way that you do or that you're working very hard just to appear ‘okay’. Counselling can help you work through what’s troubling you but it’s important that you find someone you feel you can work well with, so let me introduce myself:
Most importantly I am human (you’d be surprised how important this is in my field of work.) In addition to not being AI, what I mean by that is that in talking with me you won’t be faced with predictable and stuffy one liners or ‘psycho-isms’. I am genuinely interested in who you are and the exploration and progress we can make in each session. If you’re having a fast paced day we can work with that; if you’re feeling sad or numb we can work with that. And believe it or not, there is often laughter in my sessions - the rough and the smooth all arrive together as we work to celebrate who you are and discover the contented self you’d like to find.
I am fully qualified as a psychotherapist and work with a range of experiences. I have a particular professional and private interest in neurodiversity and my way of working reflects this. Perhaps you are investigating the possibility of having ADHD or Autism or have received this diagnosis and are now left wondering what to do with it. Discovering how neurodiversity is diagnosed is fairly accessible; unpacking the difficulties and untruths you have come to believe about yourself requires skilled and compassionate understanding. In counselling we can discover what this new understanding of yourself means for you.
Counselling can also be useful if you’re trying to make a big life decision or you are facing a relationship change which has made you feel “all at sea”. Talking and somatic therapy can help if you have had a difficult or traumatic past and you want to break free of its power. Perhaps you’ve been bereaved and feel like you need some support in finding a way forward. Or perhaps you just want to talk about your loss to someone other than family so that you can truly understand your feelings, however difficult and tangle they may be.
Through counselling, I offer you the opportunity to better understand what is going on for you. Pretending to be 'fine' can be exhausting. I believe that recovery from mental distress requires compassionate understanding through valuing your own experience and connecting with each other in a real but professionally guided way.
I offer you a space where you can be heard, really heard, in a non-judgemental, supportive and compassionate way and I will work alongside you to find the solutions or changes you are seeking.
If you're ready for support and change, feel free to get in touch with any questions or to book an appointment.
About
Some commonly asked questions you might like answers to:
What kind of counselling do you do?
I am trained in Integrative Counselling which means that I have access to a range of therapy techniques and can draw on a variety of approaches to suit you. It’s most important that how we work together feels like a good fit and as an experienced teacher and counsellor I know how important this is. We’ll check in every now and then so see if we’re going in the right direction for you.
What if I don’t know where to start?
In therapy with me you don’t have to be fantastic with words or have a clear idea of what you need. Saying “I feel zig-zaggy and stuck” is just as effective as saying “I’m overwhelmed and in functional freeze.” Sometimes it can feel as if there’s too much or it’s too painful and you’re lost for words - don’t worry, it happens. We can talk about small stuff or I can kick us off - it’s my job to help us find a way together.
I’ve got things I need to say but I’m worried you’ll think badly of me.
In counselling I provide a warm and non-judgemental space in which you can be properly heard - it’s not the same as talking to family and friends (even if they’re good listeners!). Here you can explore the whole range of what you are experiencing, notice things about yourself and work to open up new perspectives and choices without fear of being judged.
What do we do? Just talk?
Therapy works because we feel connected to each other and you feel understood. It’s very boundaried - we don’t become best friends where we share each other’s lives, it’s better than that because you get to share what is going on for you without having to spend time trying to understand me in return! Sometimes just being able to share something difficult in confidence is a relief and can help us to see it in a different light.
Having said that, I’m not just here to listen and nod. I may help you to develop strategies to manage unhelpful thoughts, feelings and behaviours and their physical effects; we may seek to understand more fully how the past might colour your present. I will work alongside you to untangle overwhelming thoughts, process emotional pain and help you discover the strengths you have to move forward.
I’m chatty too and you may find that we also discover some laughter amidst the serious stuff.
Are you qualified?
I am a member of the National Counselling and Psychotherapy Society - a regulating body that ensures that I am fully qualified. You can look me up on their database and also read about my qualifications below.
How long does counselling last?
Counselling can be short term - lasting a few weeks - or much longer, depending on the kind of things that are impacting your life and the pace at which you are comfortable to explore. We will regularly assess together how things are going and when the right time might be to move towards completing our sessions.
I’d like to work online - does counselling work this way?
Yes! I have had a great deal of experience working online with people from all over the UK. Meeting online means that you can choose a counsellor who seems like a good fit without having to be local; you can meet from the comfort of your own safe space without the need, time commitment or stress of travelling and can have your favourite cuppa or even your pet with you.
How do we begin?
Once we have made contact we may have an initial phone conversation to see if we’d like to explore working together. If we decide that we do, I’ll send you information about accessing an appointment in person or using an online platform.
If we’re working remotely, it is helpful if you can find a place where you will be uninterrupted and feel free to talk. It doesn’t matter to me what your screen background is- it is more important that you feel comfortable and private in the place you choose.
In the first session we will talk about what has brought you to counselling and what you hope to gain from it, and you can ask any questions you may have. It is a chance for you to get to know me and decide whether you’d like us to continue to work together.
Taking that first step takes courage, but if you’re feeling that now is the time to find the change you really want then booking a first meeting (with no obligation to book again unless you feel we’re a good partnership) will give you the confidence to begin to take the control you deserve.
Confidentiality
A foundation of counselling is strict confidentiality. This means that you can discuss the things that are troubling you in a way that is sometimes hard to do with family or friends. I will treat what you tell me in strict confidence, working within the BACP code of ethics, and will only share any details in exceptional circumstances such as if you tell me that you or another person is in danger. In this case I would work with you to involve a relevant authority to ensure safety.
All properly regulated counsellors undergo their own supervision sessions to make sure that we are working effectively. This means that I sometimes discuss my work with another highly qualified practitioner. This is always done anonymously and supervisors work under the same strict code of ethics and confidentiality.
Your personal details will be kept under GDPR regulations (the authority responsible for legislating about keeping personal details safely).
My Qualifications
I hold a Post Graduate Certificate in Counselling Skills and a Post Graduate Diploma in Counselling & Psychotherapy (BACP Accredited, Level 7).
I also have a degree in psychology and a post graduate teaching certificate, and have worked in education and in adult pastoral care for over thirty years.
I have further training qualifications in Adhd and Autism; bereavement; life stage transitions; anxiety and depression.
I have extensive experience of working with people of all ages and continue to undertake professional development alongside my work.
Outside of professional life I like to watch tv; design crochet kits; drink quite a bit of coffee; celebrate family and friends; collect far too many hobbies and visit the seaside.